u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
