How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
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