I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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