So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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