She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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