You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
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