can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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