just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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