Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
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