He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
