He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
