I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I want a musical about memes.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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