That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Randomize
