What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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