READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Four minutes until I can fart!
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Randomize
