It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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