I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Randomize