nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Randomize