it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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