Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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