We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
