forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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