Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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