I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Of course I have a pirate flag
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
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