She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
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