he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
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