p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
