I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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