brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
love makes seman taste better
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
Randomize