This girl is more easily done than said...
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
