My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Randomize
