3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
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