Got a toothbrush?
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
