I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
