I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
You dont lie about slip and slides
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
Randomize
