Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Randomize
