I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
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