planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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