so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
