I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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