Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
You need Xanax blowdarts
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
Randomize
