Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize