YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Randomize
