woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize