I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
