"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Randomize
