So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
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