So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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