no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Randomize
