How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Randomize
