i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
